How to become a bride this year.

Written by On Friday, 03 January 2014 13:44

As I write this it’s new year’s eve, a couple of hours to midnight. I am not at some concert pulling an all -nighter, neither am I in church praying my way into the New Year. I am home alone seated on my bed. Me, my laptop and my thoughts; I cannot imagine what better thing to do than write. As many are doing this time of the year, I have spent quite some time putting the outgoing and incoming year in perspective. My goals, my plans my prayers; I have had some pretty low lows but nothing close to what my 2012 looked like.

In 2013 I attended many weddings and watched many ‘wedding show’ episodes (yeah I said it), attended bridal showers and did a lot of other wedding related stuff, which brought me to this old saying:

Always the bridesmaid, never the bride…

The Cambridge dictionary gives several definitions for it but I will just highlight a couple;

Someone who is never the most important person in a situation

Someone who never manages to fulfill their ambition-they get close but never get the recognition they crave (*ouch too close to home )

I have personally never been a bridesmaid-I have come close several times, but never been an actual bridesmaid. (Does this mean I am worse than a bridesmaid-ouch*2) So I am not speaking out of personal experience but out of simple observation. These two things I have noted-bridesmaids never look as nice as the bride, in fact its kind of considered disrespectful to look better than the bride and secondly the bridesmaids always look happy for the bride –even if they really aren’t. Hold that thought.

You know how that old Sunday school song goes...

''Count your blessings name them one by one...count your blessings see what God has done...''

Many times I sat down ‘trying to count my blessings’ only instead I ended up counting other people’s blessings and wondering where mine were. It seems I have been spending a lot of my time being excited if not jealous of other people’s good fortune and not having people celebrate my good fortune.
This kind of thinking never ends well, but if you are honest with yourself you know you have gone there more often than not especially in this social media age. It always seems that somebody else’s life is much more ‘happening’.

Perhaps you have seen more than your fair share of wedding photos posted on Facebook the past year, or photos of your friends taking amazing trips around the world,

Maybe you have that friend who is always talking about how great her job is and how much she loves her job and you wish you say the same.

Or you are that girl who is always planning for her friend’s bridal shower or baby shower and are always wondering who will plan yours when the time comes or if the time will ever come.

Your best friend just bought that car that you have been obsessing over since you were kids and you ask yourself why you didn’t get it first.

The scenarios are many … you get the picture. You are happy on the outside but the green monster is eating you up on the inside. Or maybe you are genuinely happy for that person but cannot help wondering;

What about me?

Just about the same time I started thinking about this I came across this face book update from my very cool and deep pastor and it hit me once more how many ways God can use to confirm His word.
So you want to become a bride this year? You want to be celebrated? You want to see other people excited for you?Want to get rid of the green eyed monster? It’s pretty simple really I have come to learn.

Let God do it… rest in his unmerited, unearned undeserved favor… His grace!

In a world where we are taught that success comes through hard work, it becomes really difficult to believe that letting go and resting in God will bring us the answers to our prayers, don't get me wrong i am not saying there is no place for hard work.
But the unfortunate thing I have noticed in my life as well as many Christians is that God's grace has become a cliché. I am obsessed with doing stuff, wanting to know what others have done to get the results that they have. Last year (2013) I learnt with a lot of help from Joseph Prince that I need not to focus on doing stuff but on beholding the one who did and can still do it for me –Jesus.
This year I dare you to look to Jesus.

Zero in on him.

Focus on him.

Delight in him.

Love on him.

Minister to him and see if he will not do right by you.

If God gives such attention to the appearance of wildflowers—most of which are never even seen—don’t you think he’ll attend to you, take pride in you, do his best for you? What I’m trying to do here is to get you to relax, to not be so preoccupied with getting, so you can respond to God’s giving. People who don’t know God and the way he works fuss over these things, but you know both God and how he works. Steep your life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. Don’t worry about missing out. You’ll find all your everyday human concerns will be met.

Mathew 6:30-33

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